By the time I was sitting in the Alliance theatre watching Max McClean’s presentation of The Great Divorce, I had already purchased the collector’s edition of CS Lewis’s Classics, but had not yet read The Great Divorce, one of the stories in it.  I cried, laughed, scratched my head and was just WOWED watching this story unfold on stage.  Much to our surprise at the end of the production Max McClean (the voice behind many of the audio Bible readings) comes onstage to take audience questions.

My mind reels. I have so many thoughts and even more questions.  People around me are raising their hands and getting their questions answered.  Finally I think of what I want to ask, raise my hand, and hear, “Well that does it folks.  Thank you for coming to the show.”  “Bummer,” I think.  I wanted that opportunity to converse with Max McClean.

Daniel – my husband and dedicated theatre buddy, and I stroll Peachtree Street taking pictures and talking about the brilliance of Max McLean’s production. Along the way we took pictures of roses,  street signs, and each other until we found ourselves in front of the Sausalito West Coast Grill.  We decide to go in.  As we approach the counter, the man behind it yells out, “We’re closed.”  “Closed?” I ask.  “Are you getting ready for the dinner crowd?  It’s not even 6:00.”  “No,” he shakes his head. “We are closed.  No business.”  “Why?,” I question him.  “There are hundreds of people right down the block at The Alliance Theatre.  Why don’t you advertise there, you would get a lot of business?”  He just shook his head.

We turn to leave then heard, “OK.  Stay.  I will fix you something.  What do you want?”  Daniel and I look at each other in surprise but hurry back to the counter.  Someone else comes out to prepare the grill. He begins cooking as Daniel and I look over the menu.  The only two in the restaurant, we sit with our food and continue talking about the play.  Through the front window I notice someone who looks like Max McLean walk by. What? Was he coming into the Sausalito Grill too?

Our table was close to the door so after he was only a few steps inside, I giddily announced we had just seen the play.  He stopped.  “You did?, he asked.”  I tell him I own a copy of the C.S. Lewis collector’s edition. “ I know the one you’re speaking of,” he says in that Ten-Commandments-like tone of his.  “Yes, and I’m not a “solid person” yet because I didn’t finish it,” I add.  He chuckles (insider joke), then goes to the counter to order.

From where we sit, we hear from the same man behind the counter who spoke to us ask Max McClean, “Sir, where are you from?  You have an English accent.”  Oh, if you only knew, I think.  “Sorry sir we are not taking any more orders.  We’re closed.”  Daniel and I look at each other.  We drop ours fork and hurriedly walk to the counter.  “Mr., ” I start, “This is Max McLean.  He is the producer of the stage play that’s showing at The Alliance.  You HAVE TO fix something for him.”  With a nod, the owner says“Sir, what would you like?”

Daniel and I float back to our seats.  With order in hand, Max McLean said, “Thanks to the two of you, I have something to eat,” then walked out of the Sausalito grill.  Max McClean’s words are forever a part of my memory, but it’s Daniel’s question to Mr. McClean, “Sir, would you mind taking a picture with my wife?”, that etched them in my heart.  Even though I didn’t get a chance for my thoughts and questions to be heard as part of the audience crowd at The Great Divorce production, the opportunity I did have to use my voice is one only God could have providentially ordained.

Even when you are not called on to speak or contribute to a conversation continue to prepare and engage in your unfolding story. God sees you. God is providentially working in your life.  Ordinary days present extraordinary encounters that become the highlights in your story.

Stay encouraged my sister

Keep the faith.

God sees you.

“And do not forget to do good and to share with others, for with such sacrifices God is pleased.” Hebrews 13:16

Each day that comes our way brings with it heaps upon heaps of emotions and thoughts depending on where life has us at the moment.  So it is each year as the month of February greets us.  For some there are expectations of a proposal of forever love from a new or longtime beau, birthday celebrations with friends, black-tie black history celebration invitations, or beautifully wrapped love gifts.  “Yes, bring it ON!!!,” the excited ones yell.  Others call upon heaven to hurry the heavy loveless days into yesterday.  The love month for these pray-ers are riveting reminders of lost love or exacerbations of loneliness panging against their rib. cage.. “Lord, can we just skip over it all?,” they mutter.

What surprise then when the calendar page flips revealing the following month and some expectations remain unfulfilled.  What do we do with this new month when the longings of the prior month linger on in the new one? We cannot keep praying our todays into yesterdays, can we?  No.  The answer is no.  How then, do you embrace calendar days no matter the expectations or exacerbations they may bring?  You do this by loving yourself well.  Yes, I know.  We hear this all the time, everywhere.  It’s quite common to hear the command to: “love yourself well!”  But, how, exactly, are we to do this?  To that I say: good question.

Here are just a few ways to start loving yourself well: 

Step off of the love rollercoaster

• • Revoke the power of others to flip your love (and emotions) switch on and off 
  • No one can tell you when it’s time to find love, get married, love others, love God, love yourself,  or love ice cream (Note to self, especially, on the last one …)

Prioritize what is important to you

• • Set aside a regular time of day for what’s most important to you
  • Don’t let anything interrupt or invade this time – this is your life – you get to set the priorities of your life.

Consider less what others will think or say about you

• • Focusing on the opinions of others will stop you from moving forward. Period. Don’t let this self-sabotaging habit keep you from your calling.
  • This is a huge energy and time waster.  You need to make good use of your days!
  • Come up with a plan on how you will send those pesky people pleasing words that show up in your head, scurrying away. 
    • Will you laugh at them with a , “Ha ha ha!  I see you.  GET OUTTA HERE!”?
    • Will you flip them away, with a “Be gone!”?
    • Just be sure to have a plan to shoo them off  

Do something new to care for yourself

• • Change one (or more, it’s your choice, yes it is), eating habit for the better
  • Find a way to move more that you’ll love – whether it’s dancing, walking, riding a bike
  • Get some new pillows or luxurious bedding that transform your sleep space
  • Drop a bad habit.  For Real. For Real.

Determine that you will be the best version of yourself

• • With the help, guidance and wisdom only God can give
  • Heal. Heal. Heal. Heal.  Heal. Heal. Heal your heart.
    • Get the help you need to heal your heart.
  • Invest the time, energy and effort to improve your skills, talents, and spiritual gifts

How well you are loving others is insight into how well you are loving yourself. Are you jealous? Competitive? Are you angry with others all the time? Unhappy when others succeed?  Unable or unwilling to help others?  Argumentative? Divisive?  I’ve been all of these, and more.  It was only when I was desperate enough to know how to love that my heart was ripe enough for God to speak in a way I was able to hear.  My heart in God’s hands was necessary for me to begin a path of healing I desperately needed.

Without loving yourself well, you cannot love others well.  Without loving others well you cannot love God well.  These are not my words, this is from God Himself,  “No one has ever seen God; if we love one another, God abides in us and his love is perfected in us.” 1 Jn 4:12

My plan last year was to write a theme for the month at the beginning of every month.  This month I found myself unable to sit at the computer or even think about what to write. Every morning I tried to muster something but nothing came. NOTHING.  I finally decided to stop trying. I shooed away the, “but what are people going to think… it’s not going to look good if… what about… etc…” I decided to love myself well and to do the two things that were most important to me every morning:  (1) Exercise for at least 30 minutes a day. (2) Read my Bible passages so that I complete the Bible in a year.  Nothing would interrupt that.  Not writing, work, or anything else.  This is how I loved myself well in February.  By giving myself the break I needed from perfectionism, appearances and self-made obligations.

Oh yeah, that’s another way to love yourself well. Give yourself a break.

Being our best self is one way to honor the sacrifices of so many who gave up so much, including their lives, for so much of what we have today.
Love yourself well every day of every month of every year.
I’m rooting for you.

With the love of Christ,

2021!  OH MY GOODNESS!!!  I read a post a few days ago that said: “2020 went home, changed clothes and came back as 2021.”   Not even a full week into this year and literally hell breaks loose right before our eyes.  Who would have even thought our minds, eyes and ears could take in any more soul-wrenching scenes and sounds?

Then too there are the swirls of conversations, differing opinions, and social media commentaries galore.  Like a small stool caught in the grip of a cyclone, we can, if we are not careful be pulled into the center of the spiral and find it difficult to get back to safe land.

I think again of the post I saw that said 2020 went home, changed clothes and came back as 2021. Perhaps the clothing 2020 put on are those of a meteorologist.  As a meteorologist’s job is to prepare citizens to maneuver through weather disturbances, so perhaps was it one of 2020’s greatest lessons.  As followers of Jesus Christ, we need to be prepared to weather shifting cultural, political, economic and environmental climates.

That preparation comes in two ways: (1) Studying God’s Word, Will, and Ways, and (2) Living as followers of Christ In Community.  Both of these will keep our hearts and souls anchored, so that we do not get swept up and away with every climate change.  Let us heed the lessons of 2020 together by reading God’s beautiful, life-giving, Great News Story, The Bible, afresh. Let’s study it wider and  deeper than we ever have before. And I implore you to find a community of anchored believers that will uplift, encourage and equip you to live your life’s mission in every season.

“And the men marveled, saying, “What sort of man is this, that even winds and sea obey him?” Matthew 8:27

Keep tending to your heart.

Keep speaking.

Keep loving.

Keep talking to your children.

Keep dreaming.

Keep believing.

God’s got you. ♥️

2020 – The Year of Seeing

We also spent several months laughing, sharing, walking, praying, telling one another how glad we were to have each other to walk through the days with. We saw God reveal Truth to us in new ways. Our relationship with God deepened. Our faith stood firm – even if our knees got a little weak along the way.

Whether it’s a costume, dress-up or an all-white 70’s, 80’s or 90’s throwback celebration, I love, love, love a chance to don the clothes and dance in the garb of a bygone era. The gathering place, whether a friend’s home, a backyard, or a ballroom, is charged with energy, laughter and welcoming shout-outs to new arrivers.  The concerns of my heart and mind that accompany me to those joyful gatherings recede once I step inside.  They are overwhelmed by the sweet soulful music and memories of the good ‘ole days.

Well there has been little to none of that this year for many of us. Gone were the (in-person) throwback celebrations and serenading of one another with chart-topping songs and dance steps of the decades. Cares, concerns and CoVid would not recede.  These life and death issues still brazenly dare to take center stage in our lives. There is no dressing up or changing clothes for a quick melodic escape. We have to stand as we are, face to face with each and every thing 2020 brings our way.

Often in the midst of those soulful throwback gatherings, I’d wonder: what in the world must music in heaven sound like? And as if ponderings are prayers, God’s Great Grace answers: Music in heaven sounds like songs of oppression and suffering defeated by joy, hope and truth, victoriously reverberating through the generations. Music in heaven sounds like Jesus.

Music in heaven sounds like Jesus has come to earth.

“Behold, you will conceive and give birth to a son, and you are to give Him the name Jesus.”

Music in heaven sounds like Jesus speaking on earth.

“Jesus answered her, ‘If you knew the gift of God and who it is that asks you for a drink, you would have asked him and he would have given you living water.’ ”

Music in heaven sounds like Jesus touching the untouchables on earth.

“And Jesus stretched out his hand and touched him, saying, ‘I will; be clean.’ And immediately his leprosy was cleansed.”

Music in heaven sounds like Jesus leaving heaven on earth.

“ ‘ And I will ask the Father, and he will give you another Helper, to be with you forever, even the Spirit of truth, whom the world cannot receive, because it neither sees him nor knows him. You know him, for he dwells with you and will be in you.’ ”

“ …. ‘And behold, I am with you always, to the end of the age.’ ”

At the start of this Advent season (a period of four weeks during which we remember the coming to earth of Jesus), I think about the 400 years people waited year after year, hoping in the midst of oppression and exile, to hear music, a Word, from heaven. 2020 and its cares, concerns and CoVid are trying.  Very trying.  But Jesus has come to earth ya’ll!!!  He has walked on earth. He left Himself, His Spirit with us, in us, on earth. Where we are, (those of us who believe He is Who He is), He is also.
Glory to God! 

I look forward to dressing up, celebrating, singing and dancing with family and friends. I can hardly wait to see my fellow believers and worship God together once again. But even still, I hear now, victorious music on earth to which I dance, because Jesus came, spoke, touched, and indwells.  Remember my sister, as you contemplate the coming of Jesus Christ this advent season, His words, “I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world.” Yes, our cares, concerns and CoVid are real.  There are real life impacts to our decisions, and when things hurt, they HURT. 2020 didn’t come to play. It threw some of the hardest hits a few of us may have ever felt.

Yet still, we make room to sing and dance because difficulties, hardships, sufferings, plus THE TRUTH that joy, hope and fulfilled promises have come and are yet coming, make for some soulful music.

I hope Jesus sounds heavenly to your ears.

Grandma wasn’t just the best southern cook in all of Brooklyn, she was the best Grandmother and the queen of our castle after my mother died.  She was from Bennettesville South Carolina and nothing about her gave that away except her cooking.  Pot lids danced atop steaming boiling stock every weekend.  Some combination of chicken and dumplings, cornbread, baked ziti, baked macaroni and cheese, lima beans and neck bones, collard greens, sweet potato pie – was always piping hot and ready for any hungry body that showed up at Grandma’s  door.

She put us kids to work too. Cleaning and snapping peas at Grandma’s wasn’t worth trying to escape – though I tried to as soon as I saw the newspaper-lined dining room table. Right after us cousins were at the table snapping peas, aunts and uncles pulled out albums and 45’s.  In between carrying peas to the sink and sitting back at the table – somebody took to the floor to the sounds of Marvin and Tammy, the Temptations or the Supremes booming from the record player.  I imagined Grandma’s kitchen must be what heaven was like.

Last week I saw a man.  A translucent mask bearing three black scars on each of his cheeks, covered his face. Blood lines oozed from the corners of his lips. A three year old girl he approached scurried her little legs away as fast as they could take her as she screamed at the top of her lungs.

“Come back,” he yelled.  The boom of his voice stood her still.  “Hit me with your shield.” She turned around.  The scarred face man stepped toward her.  “Noooooo,” she cowered. “Hit me with your shield.”  She took a step forward.  “Hit me.” She charged “Raaaaahhhhhh,” and hit him on the arm with her bronze shield.  He fell backwards.  She giggled.  He stepped forward again.  “Hit me.” More confidently this time, she stepped and whacked him again.  The little girl’s belief in the “S” on her chest overtook her emotions. Soon she was laughing victoriously as she landed whack after whack on the masked man’s (her father’s) arm, until he yelled, “OK.  OK.  You win,” on that fall festival day.

This year’s Thanksgiving appears scarred, and frightening looking. Rather than endure its looming presence – a table without beloveds, bare cabinets, or however else Thanksgiving shows up different this year, retreating might seem like a viable option. For so many these days are masked behind separated families due to COVID, family discord, job loss, or indescribable heartache.

If we but stand still, despite the odd sights and sounds surrounding us we might hear a familiar voice. One that reminds us of who we are.  One like the voice of my three year old granddaughter’s father calling her to not be afraid of his ugly scars and mask. He reminded her of the powerful shield she held. My granddaughter knew her father’s voice. She trusted him. So she looked at the S on her costume and mustered the courage to whack back ugliness.

We defy the ugly of discord with love and forgiveness. We look beyond appearances to see truth and grace. We laugh with hope knowing our unpleasant circumstances don’t define us. We dodge every arrow seeking to make us forget who we are with our shield of faith.

This year’s Thanks & Giving month looks and feels different.  And yes, I am absolutely sad at times and wish it wasn’t so. Other times I remember my Grandmother and all she endured as a woman, daughter, mother, sister, grandmother in her day – yet left me unforgettable memories of her heavenly Brooklyn kitchen.  And because she was always giving, I am forever thankful. We may have to look for thanks & giving this year in ways we didn’t have to before.  But I hope you remember who you are and Whose you are in this season.  I hope you hear a voice.  One that comforts you. One that makes you smile a deep down smile and reminds you, daughter of God, that you win.

I thought I was free. Until the day I accidentally decided to be truly so.

This happened on a day I stood in the mirror trying to figure out what to do with the many strands of hair that didn’t want to cooperate. They were rebels, I tell you! Well, since they are intent on being so unruly, I think, I’ll just cut them off! I grab a pair of scissors and start snip, snip, snipping away at the long, loose strands, that refuse to do anything except fall flat on my face, until…every. single. one of them. were. HISTORY.

I lay the scissors down. Exhale. Stare at the finished product: Short. Curly. Obedient. Hair.

“WHAAAAATTTTTT??? HAVE I DONE?!” booms throughout my WHOLE self. Little did I realize as I was snipping away the rebellious strands, that I was removing all traces of my previously permed hair. Hair I’d trained and tamed since I was fourteen years old. Gone was the possibility of hearing for the thousand^th time how much I looked like Halle Berry. (LOL!!!). Gone was that sharp, conservative, corporate look I defined myself by. IT WAS GONE. DO YOU FEEL ME? Are you getting the horror that quickly replaced the feeling of accomplishment I had for a mere three seconds? I HAD TO GO OUT! OUTSIDE!!!! of my small, safe, bathroom, with short. curly. obedient. hair. God help me.

Questions loomed from every direction. What will Daniel (my husband think?) My daughters will love it, that’s for sure. They’d been telling me to go natural for years – to which I always vehemently replied – I can’t do that!!! Oh my, there’s church tomorrow???!!! Oh Lord, help me! And work on Monday? And the rest of the family? What will people think??? Say??? There I stood – chained to the opinions of others who would see, comment on, and judge, my short. curly. obedient. hair. Which, I slowly, began to like, love, accept. Love. Couldn’t take my eyes off of.

I stared at my hair until I saw something I hadn’t seen in almost forty years. Me. A chocolate-complexioned woman of African-American descent with every physical feature intentionally gifted by The Creator of the universe. Then, I heard the cling of shackles crash to the floor. “It was for freedom that Christ set us free; therefore keep standing firm and do not be subject again to a yoke of slavery,” fluttered in my heart. I walked away from the mirror, ready to face the world as a free woman, no matter how upset it might make some others.

Some were indeed dismayed, made underhanded jokes, refused to speak or look at me, removed my access to influential circles, showed their disapproval with raised eyebrows and hand over-mouth shock. Others looked into my eyes and spoke. “Your hair. Is so beautiful.” “No other style you’ve ever worn compares to this.” “Look at you!” “Have I told you how much I love your hair?” I felt, in the hugs of some, a desire too, to be free. Being uncomfortable, or worse, disliking our (or others’) God-given physical traits is a weighty ransom to pay for worldly acceptance and its false promise of security.

Freedom too, is costly. It cost Jesus. It will cost us. I had to give up believing my present and future is in the hands of anyone except God. I had to give up the burden of being enslaved to opinions of those I believed could influence my standard of living. Living free means choosing who I live to trust, please and obey. “Behold, obedience is better than sacrifice, and attentiveness is better than the fat of rams.” Every day, I choose to obey God. I choose to believe that my short. curly. obedient. hair., and every other physical feature – is a spectacular gift from God.

May whatever chains still have you bound today, be loosed so that you can walk in the freedom Jesus Christ died for you to have.

Happy freedom day today, and every day!

Then do everything you need to, to go for it!

No matter what brought you to where you are today, God has a plan and a path for your life. You can doubt it. You might not know what it is. Or, you may believe you don’t deserve any good thing from God. Your thinking doesn’t change the fact that He has a good, good, good purpose for you. Be determined to not let the joy of God’s purpose for you be stolen by your circumstances, or others’ opinions. Stay focused on God. Let Him continue to shape your character, and prepare you, tough as some of the preparation might be, for what He has for you.

Find supportive, positive people who are walking the path of their purpose, to be a living example for you, and who will encourage, and challenge you forward. But mostly, take time to sit with God. Listen for what He has to say to you. Jesus said to the Samaritan Woman at the well, “If you knew the gift of God and who is asking you for a drink, you would have asked Him, and He would have given you living water.” When you believe, REALLY believe, that you are in the presence of The Creator of The Universe, and that HE speaks to you, your life will never be the same. You will have hope unimaginable. What a beautiful sight for those who love and depend on you, to see.

Father, I pray, in the name of Jesus, you will increase the desire in the hearts of those listening to want to listen to Your voice. Not the voices of their friends, or co-workers, or family, but YOU. Speak as only You Can, Lord. Lead them, I pray, to other faithful people who will support and encourage them along the way. May you assure them through changing circumstances or questioning times that You are with them, have not forgotten them, and are pruning and preparing them for Your Plan for them. May they find all they are looking for, in Living Water. In Jesus’ Name, Amen…

Here’s A Great Article on Answering The Call of God, by Natasha Sistrunk

Be You, Beautiful!  BE YOU!

Doing anything else is too much work. Hard work at that. Pretending to be somebody we’re not or swallowing our opinions because of what others might think, is tiring and unhealthy. Living like this for years can cause emotional harm if we begin to believe there is something wrong with us and right with everybody else.

Well here’s the truth: “We are the clay, You are the potter, we are all the work of Your hand.” Every single one of us is made in the image and likeness of God!

It doesn’t matter what others think of how tall, short, light, dark, fat, skinny, you are, where you live or don’t live, the kind of job you have, whether you talk with your hands, or like being a quiet introvert.  Thank God for the creation gifts He has given you, including your personality and features. You are to honor Him with how He made you.

Lord, help every reader of this grow in their love of the creation gifts you blessed them with. Help each one see Your handicraft when they look at themselves and others. Grow them in greater health: emotionally, physically, mentally and spiritually. May they glorify You and You alone with the fullness of their lives.